Saturday, March 31, 2007

The Pursuit of Happyness

Last night I rented " The Pursuit of Happyness". What a great movie! Talk about motivating it was that and more. It reminded me that where I live you can do and become what you set your mind too. It takes having a dream and chasing after it.....It means doing the work. It means thinking big...the movie was a great reminder of where I live and the possiblities that can happen here.

Talking about what can happen here is sems that some that pursue happyness get stuck on a downward spiral like the character Will played and some end up on the street like him, some end up in shelters and more and more it is happening to families here in the US and Canada and that is such a SHAME. I often see us worrying about the traviesties far away ie Iraq, Afganistan, Africa but the plight of the poorest kids well I wonder how many of them may begin to hate the land where they live cause of LACK in lands of wealth? To come back from that kind of reality is so hard. I know from first hand experience.

I havent ever really blogged about the hardest six months of my life. I ended up in a shelter when I was 7 1/2 months pregnant with Roo. I was in Carlsbad NM. I couldnt get back to Canada as I was in a high risk pregnancy and travel was impossible. I ended up in the shelter there and am thankful there at least is a shelter system. The counsellors and staff were great really but i was so sad, at what should of been a happy time. I was suicidal in fact that Thanksgiving Day all I could think about is how I wanted life to be over. If I had not of been carrying Roo I would not be here today. It was because I couldnt end her life that I am here.
Roo was born without a home as many kids are money...and no resources. I can relate to the anger, fear, frustration that many that find themselves at the bottom of the pile.

Roo was born into extreme American poverty that is the reality for 100,000 of thousands in the land of plenty. The programs like Foodstamps, WIC, welfare are well very lacking in really helping to give a helping hand up and dont get me started on how the US and Canada treat our should be a crime. Especially when they may be disabled due to service to country.I could rant for days on that topic but I degress.

It was the help of a few friends esecially the help of one man who happens to be one of the towns prosectors. He let me look after his mom for a few months and that got me the money that I would eventually travel back to Canada on.

Rachel was 8 months old when we got back to Canada finally in Aug of 1998...and again we were homeless and again having to go to a shelter. This time the Red Door here in Toronto took us in. Thankfully we were in this shelter a very short time....10 days and then I was able to get a room and launch a life here in Canada.

By the time Roo was 16 months old I had found a fulltime job...and again was pursuing happyness but It was more then a struggle and I can understand why that struggle leads some to give up and turn to hate, and anger and even to home grown terrorism....all you have to do is really see the pain that is there.

The one thing that I think matters most as we travel on this pursuit are the people that cross our paths....for me I will never ever forget those who gave a listening ear, groceries when we were without, a place to stay after a deadly fire, the advice of great thinkers who I have ben blessed to meet, there are many who have helped to remind me that the pursuit of happyness in well worth it.

Right now I aint where i want to be but i am not where I used to be either....I am pursuing my road to happyness!


mitchowl said...

Hi Hollie,
I haven't visited for a long time. Glad I could catch up to you. Take care.

Lorelai said...

Very nice post about over coming struggles and having the strength to see them through. **hugs**

HOLY said...

The movie was very touching - I took the kids days after it came out and we all loved it.

Tenacity is what gets us through these hardships....tenacity and chance encounters and the kindness of strangers.

It sounds like you've known what it's like to hit bottom. But don't forget to be kind to yourself along the way in this journey.

Anyways, your story is equally compelling - you still writing it, is all.


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